youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8fSjtPLuBQ]
I have not been able to get enough of this song!  I love it and it seems that little things keep popping up in my life these days that keep me coming back to these incredible lyrics.  I have discovered that the more I learn, the more I realize that I have only barely scratched the surface.  Just when I think I've got something figured out, I realize just how much I don't know.  And so this week, Holy Week, I've been thinking about how much I don't know about the lengths God goes to to show His love for me.  That's really what this week is about, right?  Passionate love that's extreme and beyond our human comprehension.  Holy God, sent His Son to die for me and you.  Simple sentence but at the same time so mind blowing.  I'll admit that I've heard it so many times over my lifetime so far that I've gotten numb to it.  I hate to say that, but it's true and if you grew up in church in the Bible belt,  you know you'd say the same thing.  Maybe it's because I have kids now or maybe it's because I've lived long enough to get some heavy duty sin under my belt.  I don't know, but this year I think I'm just starting to feel the weight of that statement.  I tried to imagine if I was asked to sacrifice my own son for people I did not know.  No brainer-NO WAY!   But God sacrificed His Son on behalf of an eternity of people AND He DID know them.  He looked through time and saw every single person, every single heart, every single  motivation, every single time He would speak and be ignored, every single time He would show love and grace and be rejected, every single time He would relentlessly pursue us offering His best and we would still choose someone or something else over Him.  And yet, He did it anyway.  On my very best day, I will never be able to wrap my mind around even a fraction of that kind of love.  If Jesus would go so far as the cross for me, who's to say how far He would go to get my attention, to show Himself to me, to prove His love for me day in and day out?  The crucifixion proves to me that He's no holds barred, no rules, no limits.  If He's neat and manageable and heaven help me, explainable, then I don't really know who He is.  Like the song said, "I think I made You too small" and I think I'm finally realizing what a sinful tragedy that has been in my life.  There's another song sung by Mandisa (for all you American Idol freaks,er I mean fans out there) called "God Speaking" and the lyrics of the chorus say:
Who knows how He'll get a hold of us
Get our attention to prove He is enough
He'll do and He'll use whatever He wants to
To tell us "I love you".
He can do and use whatever He wants to speak to us.  Of course, I believe He primarily uses the Bible, but think of all the other things He uses.  Nature, a conversation, a book, a song, a billboard, a loss, an obstacle.  And even crazier than that, He can tailor it to fit each of us perfectly.  He knows how much I love music and books, so He often uses a song or a sentence to grab my attention.  He designed You too and so He can speak to you in a specific way that can touch you like nothing else can.  WOW!  He does ALL this because He loves us.  He's already proved it.  He's already done the ultimate-you'd think that would be enough.  But His love is unfathomably limitless and crazy wild!  So big that even a glimpse into it would drive us to our knees.  So I have spent this week basking in my own ignorance, thankful that He has allowed me to know just enough to know that I don't (and on this side of heaven won't ever) know much.